Anakosha
Awakening the Divine Feminine
Tantra
Prologue: This page is written from a feminine perspective. As a senior woman I have been researching Tantra for years but only recently did I discover a shocking piece of news: that Tantra is a male-oriented discipline. It has been so from very ancient times. It is a discipline handed down by the ancients from pre-history, and it is designed to teach men, not women, how to activate the holy spirit called "kundalini". Kundalini is pure life-giving spirit located at the geometric center of the body near the sex organs. It is my conclusion that Tantra is not a path for women because from personal experience, and observation of others in intimate environments, I have concluded that the female body has an inside track to cosmic consciousness. She IS the holy spirit locked up and bound frozen into matter. My views will be unorthodox and men may not agree with me, but I suspect women will. Having lived with an awakened kundalini for 45 years, and enjoying a charmed life as a result, until recently, I believed that men really were the experts and should control things. I was a loyal supporter of the patriarchal system in which I was raised and I lived the life of appropriate service even to the point of subservience. I was a lover and a giver who put the needs of others before me. Kundalini is still active in me and recently the ultimate break-through came - a clear understanding of the most basic human need has clicked into place. The female gender has much to teach the male and it would behoove him to listen. She, the female, has advanced knowledge that he does not have and that is love. It will be to his great benefit to raise her up and honor her as an equal.
Kundalini is the goal of Tantra. The female body is already wired and flowing with its supernatural powers. Kundalini when fully awakened releases limitless cosmic love. Women are already flowing with limitless cosmic love but are not aware of it. Kundalini is pure abstract consciousness. Pure abstract consciousness is light. But it is like light from the sun. The sun's light is cold in space. It does not heat up until it strikes the earth. Then it is felt as heat. The pure abstract consciousness in human beings is designed to travel up the spine to meet the sun's rays, and down the legs to meet the earth's rays. It does this automatically and no one has paid any attention to it. It radiates slowly, gently, upward into the body and downward into the earth. The only probably is, men do not feel it. They have shut their emotions down, while women are open to the flowing of love within them. They are living embodiment of love. And men have to "work" at it. The ancients left the teachings behind for men to become conscious of the living power of spirit that is within them. Where are the teachings for the women?
Because the male body is wired to focus outward in order to build externally, he shuts off inner feelings as a distraction. Thus the flow from this pure life force is stopped. It builds up near the genitals and is felt as sexual pressure. The loins heat up and the first rung of the ladder, known as the second chakra, becomes alive with extreme love and yearning. If he doesn't use it he will explode. Thus sex becomes a need and the woman gives it to him. She naturally feels his need because she is a receiver and she cannot tell what is her and what is him for she feels everything. She is a receiver and she is a giver because she is a responder and a flow-er. She flows this light which becomes very heated when it is blocked. Both of them are unconscious of how their precious and sacred bodies work. They lack consciousness and they do what their ancestors have always done. Physical animal sex without conscious appreciation, love, gratitude, honor and respect for the pure and holy spirit within them is wasted. The most precious gift in the universe is going to seed because of lack of knowledge of the God force.
Women are wired to receive the kundalini naturally, slowly, with harmonic and cyclical regularity. Women are receivers, which is why they can produce babies, but they have been raised to think of themselves as worthless, vacant, stupid, dumb, or worse. Women have no idea of the universal power they contain within their bodies. It is pure abstract consciousness located at the base of the spine or low abdomen, in both men and women. It drips its essence up the spine to circulate through the body to give the body life. The ancient teachings were passed on only to those who instinctively were drawn to the teacher. Today gurus are carrying on the tradition on a larger scale, but it lacks the feminine teaching. Men work at activating it through disciplines and slowly, in this current age, women are joining the ranks of disciples, showing signs of subservience to the male master. Where are the teachings for women to activate the divine feminine within them? They who are already flowing with cosmic consciousness and the greatest love in the universe - Mother God love? It has been said that the greatest among you must be the least, to serve the greater whole.
As for me, I started out with a spontaneous kundalini awakening one day without any fore-knowledge or training, and found myself in unlimited fields of love and light. Bliss, ecstasy, out of this world. And from that day forward, my work began. Bringing love down into my normal every day life with my husband was the hardest job in the world. But as I surrendered to this highest of the highest in me, I was rewarded with extrasensory sensations, elevated feelings of self love. It took a long time. I couldn't share it in words so I had to embody it. There was no other way. It's so far beyond human love that it has to come out in action and mannerism in the every day, normal, practical, mundane life.
Recently I was led to what I call the "final chapter" in kundalini. I started reading scholarly male-oriented journals by the experts of Tantra and kundalini knowledge. It has been shown to me the underlying secret codes of the male and female genders. Men and women's bodies flow in distinctly opposite directions with different focuses. We sit with our backs pressed against each other, looking away off into the distance. I feel that it is time for us to turn around and face one another as equals, and focus our far-reaching gazes upon each other. Since women have always been considered second class citizens, men have not realized the cosmic ecstasy that comes from embracing the WHOLE feminine. He has been using her body to satisfy himself, but what if he backed away and studied her wholeness? And absorbed her mentality? Her spirituality? Her emotionality? Her great boundless love that is forever? Then he would fulfill his own hungry spirit with his own femininity. Likewise, for women to do the same with men and absorb his strength and power for herself and become the fullness of her masculine side. It would bring great peace to the human race if we would all do that. For men are 50% feminine themselves, and women are 50% masculine. Perhaps we don't know how. Maybe my heretofore untold views and stories will help us find a way.
I am Diana of Anakosha and I keep changing this page. I'm writing it more like a book than a blog. It is continuing. The first posting was on 1/5/21, below. Stay tuned as I continue to make changes. It was intended to be a one-page acknowledgment of Tantra's benefits. Silly me. Tantra is an ongoing awakening to ever greater awareness flowing through the meridians and nerves of the body.
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1/11/21 - Tantra with a partner is preparatory for inner union
Tantra is a path, like religion. There are many leaders, many centers, many groups and many practitioners. There is no one way to practice Tantra. It is a spiritual path. One must find it on his or her own. Practice with a partner prepares you for union with the other half of yourself. It is difficult to grasp the concept that you are both male and female in your makeup. So connecting with the opposite gender for Tantra practice is a first step. It aligns you with energies of the opposite gender, which is your diminished side, your weaker side. This practice accelerates the spin of atomic particles in your physical body. They attempt to align with the presence of the other body. You can feel it if you focus your attention on it, which requires the guidance of a teacher. This is the beginning of activating your light body, which is your higher consciousness.
The light body is a web-like structure composed of thousands of little conduits called meridians that run everywhere in your body delivering the light of consciousness and vitality. The separation game played on Earth shuts down these higher connections to the meridians, because we are all focused on the physical. Tantra reconnects us. Tantra requires discipline. One must be disciplined to practice it. Without a leader guiding you to notice certain things, you would never do it. Consciousness is everywhere in the universe and you are connected to this wholeness, this oneness, this source, this intelligence, this creative love and light. It is in you. But it is shut down to only what is required for a species. For example, insects have insect consciousness. Birds have bird consciousness. Horses have horse consciousness. Humans have human consciousness. But humans as a race are on the brink of expanding out of human consciousness to a higher, more unified consciousness. The next level for human is beyond friction, harm, suffering and pain. It is more like the angelic but still human.
Most spiritual paths attempt to get away from physicality. The Tantric path is the only spiritual path that embraces sexuality. More than that, it recognizes the power behind sexuality. Sex is only the feeling of repressed power. We do sex and it gives us release. But there is more to this. The Tantric path leads practioners ever onward to higher consciousness levels, to embrace the whole physical world within the warm and loving arms of the divine perspective. It does not consider sex a sin, but rather holds it within the divine embrace. All physical pleasures are to be enjoyed within the divine embrace of harmony. It is our physical focus that has shut out our higher consciousness.
If you were born to parents who taught you and guided you every day to focus on a physically-based world, your consciousness has been reduced to a physically-based focus. All attention is on physical structures, such as education, books, food, clothes, houses, transportation, health, laws, all physically based. Logic shuts down the magic of imagination which is higher consciousness. When you engage with a partner in a Tantra session, you activate your cells and spin points by closely connecting with the energies of your partner. Your energy fields overlaps and merge. You activate the spaces between the cells and atoms inside your own body. You feel this as a calming sensation. It is actually another dimension of your consciousness and you begin to access new understanding. It is part of you. It is a raising of your consciousness to higher levels than physical. Your focus moves beyond the surface level to a more subtle and refined levelk, all connected to within yourself. You can't help but feel it. It feels closer to home, closer to natural, and it is peaceful. In the beginning of practicing Tantra a teacher is required to guide you. Otherwise you would think you are just sitting next to someone of the opposite gender and wonder “what’s the purpose?”
With guided instruction you move your focus inward to the feeling of sensations. The next level up is the emotional level, called called the astral level in esoteric schools. Emotions are felt as energies when they start to move in the physical tissues. If they don’t move, you don’t feel them. Above the emotional level is the mental level, which is more subtle, less dense than the emotional level, and more refined. It is the level of the average mind. There is a higher level to the mind which is spiritual. This is even more subtle and refined than mental. Your consciousness, under guidance and practice, slowly rises up higher and higher. At the spiritual level your attention turns godward, towards the divine and celestial. It is very elevating. And all of this is possible to achieve with a partner, if the partner is right for you and compatible. The selection of the right partner for Tantric practice is challenging, however. If the partner is attractive to you, you could get stuck at the attraction level and not go any further. Emotional entanglements bring romance and you are back into human affairs again. The goal of Tantra is a journey to within, not to within the other partner! The idea is to move your inner awareness inward to more subtle levels. The densest is physical, the next lighter is emotional, then mental, then spiritual, then into divine experiences that border on ecstatic, rapture, called samadhi.
Having a partner of opposite gender who is thinks like you or close to it, is definitely helpful. The problem is, here in the west Tantra seems to be confused. Women interpret it one way, men another. I’ve talked with different people. Yet there is a science to Tantra. It involves the mystical phenomenon of kundalini and the more practical aspects of yoga, namely postures, breathing and meditation. One obstacle that I see which stands in the way, is monogamy. Because Tantra has the aura of sexuality around it, there could be jealousy. The cultural tradition of monogamy has held many an individual back from advancing themselves through higher stages. Most relationships are made based on personal attraction. But Tantra is not personal and not for the purpose of pleasure or to build romantic involvements. Tantra is an impersonal journey into the higher divine self, using a partner. In the ancient past I read that Tantric gurus, the ones who took students under their wing, would select partners for Tantric practice. Partners would be selected based on challenging proclivities that would not allow them time to fall in love with each other. This might go against the normal grain of the western mind, but it serves to show what Tantra is really all about. There is a reason for using a partner of the opposite sex but it is to enhance oneself, not the partner.
Primary partners will probably not make good Tantric partners, except for the rare couple who are on the same page. The personal attraction approach is largely based on neediness, either physical, sexual or emotional. Not good for the goals of Tantra. But what about intellectual similarities? That might be a better way of choosing a Tantric partner. In the monogamous relationship, if the husband is interested in Tantra but the wife is not, cheating is not the answer because it would cause guilt. Having guilt in the consciousness is not a good way to attain higher consciousness, it would provide a blockage. Frank and open discussions is the only answer. In fact, intellgectual discussion is a good way to open communication between husband and wife if there is stagnancy between them. Up to now, swinging has been accepted as a way to expand the couple consciousness by mixing up energies through sexual swapping. It stimulates them and enhances them. But for one who has grown beyond the superficiality of swinging, and seeking for a more refined way to expand, Tantra is definitely the way to go. I am thinking of creating some workshops myself, but not there yet. And more recently, polyamory and open relationships have become ways for couples to expand themselves. Everyone thinks this is about sex, but it is actually about consciousness expansion. The need to evolve, to better themselves, to understand ones place in the universe. But so far as I can tell, open relationships, polyamory and swinging all deal with the same level of human consciousness. Human. There is needed a more spiritually elevating path to explore that takes into consideration love, sex and the divine union of spirit.
Bottom line, if your primary partner is nowhere ready to accompany you on the Tantric path, then ask your inner guidance. Take time to raise your own consciousness yourself. There is a power within that you haven’t been using. If you are a normal human being you haven’t even begun to touch it yet, although you have had flashes of insight, perhaps even revelations in the form of visions. This consciousness is what we call God. It is holding the cells and atoms of our glands, organs, muscles and bones together. It is the space between the electrons and sub-atomic particles that are in constant motion. Go silent and stop all action. Think the question into the silence and wait. Listen. Just listen. And then get up and go back to your life. You will see. You will receive thoughts and ideas. Love yourself deeply enough to sit alone with yourself. Love is all there is. It is there inside as your own higher consciousness.
This is the homework. It is at the practical level that the greatest amount of work is required. Like taking time out to listen to our body talk. We must learn to isolate our selves from the pack once in awhile to do this. It is transformational work. We are meant to link, join, fuse our inner self with our outer self. The outer self needs is the result of the past. We created it when we were at lesser levels of knowledge and understanding. We are growing in consciousness. Tantra is consciousness work. It brings our focus away from external obsessions and desires and re-trains us to focus on the subtleties. The inner path means inner body. There are many inner paths but none are quite like Tantra.
1/5/21 - Tantra from a feminine perspective
This page about Tantra is presented from a feminine perspective. I (Diana) had a spontaneous kundalini awakening 45 years ago without any training or fore-knowledge. Kundalini and Tantra are related. Kundalini comes from Tantra. Or maybe Tantra comes from kundalini. My kundalini experience was unplanned. It took place during a guided meditation. I experienced going into a sea of light and unbounded reason and harmony and lost awareness of my body. For a few minutes I was part of an unbroken sea of loveliness, order, intelligence, unity, grace, love and more that words can't say. It was unexpected and I didn't know what happened to me. My body began swaying and ended up jumping up and down. My sister who was guiding me allowed me to go through these antics without saying anything. Later that evening she asked me where had I learned to do that. When I told her I didn't learn, it just happened, she was stunned. She was a follower of an Indian guru and had seen others go through the same actions at ashrams. She had never seen it happen without prior training. She introduced me to the word "kundalini" and advised me to find a teacher because its arousal could be dangerous. A more detailed account of that first experience can be found HERE. It is the first five chapters of what was intended to be a book, written many years ago but then life happened and I never finished it.
That first experience probably wasn't longer than five, maybe ten minutes, I am unsure, but it took all day for me to come back to normal. From that day on, it was a force unleashed and I couldn't put the lid back on. Over the next 7, 8, 9 years I had many revelations and experiences that I couldn't talk about rationally. They continue today in a smooth integrated way. I journaled a lot in the beginning to make it feel real for myself, otherwise it would have been lost. The writings have continued into today. My files are now overflowing. Over the last few weeks I have become aware that I came at this from the wrong end as compared to the male gurus, saints and mystics who teach how to awaken kundalini through certain disciplines. But to me, it just happened. Not as a bolt of lightening but as the sweetest, gentlest thing. I came into this force from the topside down, from the opposite direction as written in ancient texts. I have formed several conclusions but I am still learning. I have concluded that my experience is because I am a woman, a feminine being, my soul is feminine, I am naturally a flowing being, not a disciplinarian. I entered into something that was a very high place, very, very high, and I have been trying to bring this vast love and light and sweetness down into everyday life, to put words to it and share it physically with my hands and hugs, to ground it into all that I do. It has been very difficult because I am too light. It was like trying to dive down to the bottom of the ocean without weights. Impossible. It took many years. I have journaled practically every day over the last 45 years. I have been spirit led. There is an inner wind that blows through me at times, causing my body to move and when it moves through me it fills me with unbelievable bliss that transports me beyond this world. The physical sensations are exquisite. I so wish I could share it with others. It is so loving.
My experiences with kundalini was not the result of a disciplined program such as teachers of yoga and meditation present. I did not meditate before this took place, nor practice yoga. Afterward I would have meditated all day if I could. I could not stop myself from going into trance. It was very, very powerfully blissful, like I imagine being on drugs. I had to apply effort to come back. Everything being taught today to awaken kundalini is an organized discipline led by a teacher - yoga, breath work, visualizations, mantras - there are many techniques and programs. Why I had this dramatic breakthrough experience without preparation, without guidance, without anyone to ask about it, I had no idea. I have wondered about it. Last month I had some insight given to me. These insights I will share as I go along. It's about love in human form.
My kundalini awakening came from love. There are infinite levels of love. There is no end to love. I can say that from personal experience. One must become conscious, however, of what love is and how to apply it. I learned about love by acting on, first, self love and secondly physical love with another. My husband turned out to be the best guide and helper I could have asked for had I known. He was better than a guru because he loved me in a personal way. He has passed now but I have another husband who also loves me in a personal way. He too is a loving guide and friend, in a different way than my late husband, but precisely what I need at this time in my life. Human love has no bounds. Each is different. It took years of stumbling to come to this realization. I am now ready to put my conclusions into print. I'll do it here on this website. In those early days, trying to bring this vastness - I wouldn't call it love at that point - down to normal levels of human interaction was like forcing your fat belly into too-tight pants. Or trying to dive to the bottom of the ocean without weights. It just didn't work. Fortunately my husband kept asking questions instead of shutting me down.
Kundalini is a cosmic force too powerful for humans to bear. It comes into a human life through love. Tantra is a path for human beings to carefully bring this force into one's daily physical mental emotional spiritual life in a balanced way. It develops kindness, tenderness and caring for others. This vastness slowly transforms the human being into the magnificent potential he is meant to become. Love is caring about other humans. Caring is what helps this God-awful power to come under biological and mental control. It's a force so powerful it has driven people insane who didn't know what they were doing. It could destroy a whole planet if it were discovered and directed with evil intent. I didn't know about Tantra in the early days of the awakening, but love was there to help me in the form of my husband. Every day I took several hours to go into a closed room and into trance. I taught him, instead of interrupting me with a question, to come and place his hand on top of my head and wait for me to come back. This cut the connection. Otherwise I could not interact with him with words. I would move like a zombie. I needed both the "away" time and his help in coming back to normal. There were times when I couldn't stand it any more and sometimes in those early days, I had to excuse myself wherever I was - at airports, the home of friends, in a public store - and yield to the inner wind and take the involuntary dance-like postures. I couldn't help it. To not yield to this inner wind would build pressure like I would explode. I needed to give it freedom to move 'through' me. It was like cutting the eagle free from its tether so it could soar into the sky. After I felt the bliss flowing through my arteries and veins, I felt wonderful, and was able to continue on what I was doing.
Kundalini is mysterious but there is research being done on it now. Gopi Krishner was instrumental in bringing that about. His books are very scholarly and he uses different words than I use. To me, Kundalini is the unformed potential that provides the power to the physical body and gives it life. It is there in everyone, approximately in the area of the tail bone below or above the sex organs. It doesn't affect the biological functions until it is used. Love is not the only way to tap into this dormant potential, but conscious love is. Sexual love requires love, else it is animal sex. Consciousness and intention is the power that awakens it. Love is the only way to integrate it into the mind and body in a healthy way. Love integrates everything that is out of whack, out of kilter and wrong in a life, with the pure loving spirit of holiness. It was human love that brought me successfully to where I am today, fully integrated after many years. I am led to form my own conclusions and share them. At one time I wanted to 'teach' it, but you can't teach love. You can only share. Sharing is a form of love. As I share these words it opens doors for me to continue receiving more insight. I am learning that love between human beings comes in many, many, many forms. It was the willingness of my husband to be curious with me, who commented, gave me feedback, asked me questions, hugged me when I was haunted, took me to work with him when I was afraid of ghosts, and made me warm milk and sat with me when the evil struck. He made it possible for me to come back to normal again. He kept grounding me to normalcy. Kundalini is the force that keeps the universe operating smoothly. It is held in check by great beings of love. Kundalini is embedded in every human body. It's the only way a human body can be born here. It is the life force. It is a great cosmic power, but love is the directing force. Love melds us together as in unity. Without my husband's constant caring presence, I am sure I would have ended up a psychotic mess. There are many stories of such. They say the spiritual path is strewn with the broken bones of countless seekers. I am eternally grateful for my husband who helped me through it. But there is more to this story.
2 - The feminine approach vs. the masculine approach
A well-grounded sister friend once told me that I was not using my left brain at all, the logical side of the brain. She herself was a very balanced woman. Several months ago (2020) I activated my left brain after years of inability to focus, stabilize or maintain concentration. I started saying to myself, "Left brain activate!" This has changed me. Now I am reading scholarly reports about kundalini and learning about the experiences of others. There is a kundalini research institute online. Kundalini is the power behind Tantra. The search for kundalini came first, as told in very ancient vedic scriptures. Tantra was always vague. I felt it instinctively but did not understand what it was. Now that my left-brain is operating better - not perfect but better - understanding is taking place. It is very satisfying to me. It does not take the place of personal experience but it assures me that kundalini is real. And that other people have also had this experience, and that it is beyond human understanding. It is a mystery. Reading that others have created words to explain some of the phenomena is like finding gold at the end of the rainbow. It is the jewel in the lotus, and it is sacred.
Now that I have completed the transformation process, I am permitted to know the science a little better. The information is coming to me piece by piece, like a curriculum. The science is a masculine science, not a feminine one. There are teachers and practices. There are words. There is a logic, an explanation, as far as it can go. The mystery has been solved, almost. It has been a thrilling "AhHA!" to discover this book by John White, published in 1979, which I recommend for everyone interested in the science. I have added it to the newly created Book page. It is entitled "Kundalini, Evolution and Enlightenment". In ancient times in India seekers called this great divine love located at the pelvic region "shakti", a feminine term, Shiva being the masculine father form. The ancient seers realized the power of divinity when they felt themselves overcome with reverence. They learned how to amplify it with their super-consciousness, a higher level than their practical lmind. They learned that this power was conscious, and it could be expanded by focusing a high level of consciousness on it. A low level did nothing. This created a connecting consciousness that ran like a web stretching out everywhere, touching all sentient life, with this power.
This consciousness is a living thing, but it is only amplified by consciousness. The power of unifying two different life forms is through super-consciousness. This is how harmony is created between two partners. Their word for web or net is Tantra in sanskrit. Those who understood this approach veered off the strictly celibate path of kundalini, and began a separate path different from other spiritual paths. Reverance, love, shakti, feminine became more of an influence. Recognition of divinity humbles a person. Kundalini is the potential, the mother of life who receives the unformed father of life which is flows unnoticed and is wasted, until it is recognizes. Then it enters the biological system of physicality and is felt as love. To simply seek kundalini as the power only, without love, is dangerous. One must ALWAYS approach it with reverence and respect or it will blow out the circuits of the body and brain as many have discovered.
The father of life is the supreme authority which has not yet entered the biological form. It flows on past the one who does not see it or recognizes it. The one who raises his mind and conscious awareness up to higher moral values in surrender, a religious approach, becomes a chalice to receive the father's love raining down like water gathering in a pitcher. One cannot help oneself with this flooding and is bent over in humbleness. This is the higher force known as the top kundalini that comes down from above, to meet the lower kundalini at the base of the spine. When the lower and the higher meet it becomes the holiest of holies. Tantra in the modern western world is learning about using both the top and bottom kundalini, the father and mother forces. To only use the lower kundalini is just sex. There is every possibility that Tantra done in this fasion, with the feminine forces being unleashed, will transform the human race. Sex is to be enjoyed, but to amplify it in this way is to, well, it goes beyond sex. The human body is built for bliss, according to Dr. Candice Pert, a biologist. We are wired for it. How to bring that bliss about is the question everyone is asking. The subject of two kundalinis - the one from heaven and the one from earth - makes Tantra the highest path of all because it brings heaven to earth. All other spiritual paths seem to try to get away from the world and the body, or to transcend the world by avoiding sex. That is why modern day Tantra is a feminine path. Sex will be transformed in time with help of the awakened female of the species, by insisting on lifting the consciousness up out of the dense, stiff walls that men have built around everything.
I have become aware that the masculine mind must analyze, form conclusions, create words and names and make a science out of that which is, by nature, unnamable. The mystery is unformed and unknown. The female accepts this and is connected. It is not the feminine way to name a thing. Her way is to join with it and be grateful for it, to feel it and flow with it. At least it is with me. The most famous gurus who went down in history were men with one or two rare female gurus who were so outstandingly powerful in their way, that they were noted in history. But most female gurus were stricken from the records. I love reading about all of them today, the men have shed much light on what I have experienced. I do not discount them. I revere them and see their place in our world. It is important to read, intellectualize, learn and define. Men are disciplined and shut down the feelings of emotions so they can concentrate on borders and outlines and structures. They follow rigid programs. Religions were made by men. The ancients learned about the holy fires within the pelvic bowl of the human body, and their followers copied them, learned how to do the same, wrote down the formulas and formed a steady path for others to follow. They have been carving out a lighted way for others down through the centuries. But nowhere has the feminine path remains partially unformed and remains in the heavens. Only the masculine way can attempt to define it. Perhaps this is why I have activated by left brain.
There is a feminine way to reach the holiness within. It is natural to females but it is not understood and so many women do not know their own value. They do not have confidence. This is why I am writing and sharing my experiences. The feminine way does not need fixing or correcting, it needs empowering. It is a two-gender system that we have here on earth. The women embody this understated wholeness of love - we call it feminine - and the men build a science around it, make it solid and real. The female feels inward, the male looks outward. The female remains connected to emotions while the male shuts emotion down. The female resonates with inner emotions and expresses kindness, caring, empathy, compassion, nurturing, support and impersonal love for everything. While the male builds barriers and obstructions in order to protect her. This is what human beings are like. There is a quirky wholeness to the system with the female embodying beauty and men focus on building structures with hammers and nails. That may sound feminist, but it is a healthy perspective. Men and women each have their roles to play. It has been a patriarchal world for many centuries, where women are the silent partners and considered unimportant because they were silent. Some cultures even treated women like slaves and abused them, even putting them to death for not doing as they told. And since women were so wonderfully connected to nature, animals and growing things they knew how to heal. They knew what was wrong. They know how to love a wounded body back to health but this was unacceptable to men because in their outer focus they didn't understand it. I speak of centuries ago, and so back then the men decided to create their own form of healing, which was structured in, well, what can I say? It is weird to me today how the pharmaceuticals and the doctors operate. It is not natural to me. But, well, it's OK. Times are going to be changing soon. This age is coming to an end. There is a growing consciousness taking place. Higher minds. Men and women are learning to fit better together and complement each other.
I speak from my own perspective. It is my feeling to speak about a different guidance system especially for women, for they are the true teachers of Tantra. While most leaders are men, look and see that there is a woman working alongside him. The women will empower women, validate them, reassure them, for the men cannot do it alone. Women will tell other women that what they feel as love in the secrecy of their private heart IS love and it is holy and it is powerful and it is sacred beyond any words spoken from an outsider. Believe in your love within. Live the tenderness, compassion, the honesty, the truth, the sacred feelings that are you fee, if you truly feel it. What has been missing for the women is confidence. They have been made to feel valueless, unimportant, disrespected, silenced. They must activate their left brain. Tell yourself "Left brain, activate!" And keep repeating this. See the changes this will bring. Women have a powerful side that has been made to feel worthless. As they cultivate their masculine side, their left brain, they will begin to shine the light on their true inner worth. Have faith in your inner knowledge. Inner knowledge is the only knowledge worth having. Know yourself by the feelings that pass through you. Elevate those feelings and be glad. Do not give your powerful feelings away to anyone who stands outside of you, physically, until you know it is time to give it. The only authority is your higher self. Your super-mind is your mentor and guide. It tells you when it is time and when to hold back. This is not your mundane everyday self, but your higher self, your moral higher self above your head.
What you feel in the privacy of your thought is true if it is compassionate and elevated. If not, then transform it and raise it up. Strengthen that feeling within which leads to greater love for all beings, even your enemies. It is time to believe in yourself and work it into your daily life. You are the power behind the throne. Men, be edified by these words. Use them as they fit you, as you feel them fit you. Men may understand better the ways of a woman by reading this. Even though a man has a different role to play as protector and shield, a man also has a feminine side. This side can be amplified and brought into balance. It is worth considering. The feminine side has been driven out of many men by severe fathers who selfishly controlled their children from infancy with unemotional, cold-hearted, unfeeling criticism and harsh demands. It has been a strict social culture that we have lived in built of psychological slavery.
This may sound harsh and it may sound to be a heretical approach to Tantra, but I believe it is one that will take root over time, as women become fiercely independent in their ability to love and heal, as they see fit, the wounds of an almost broken planet. It is an evolutionary step for the species to have the women come back into their natural power. Not the power that men are afraid of but the power that men will fall in love with all over again. It will bring the genders back together again as each gender is equal in quality to the other gender. Equal to equal in all things, each with a role to play. Each with an opposite perspective which complements and thus empowers the other, bringing about wholeness. It is as natural as the wind and sunlight that men and women should create together a life of enjoyment, abundance, beauty, pleasure and betterment.
3 - Tantra with a partner
Tantra is the science of love in human form. It is not the science of sex unless love has been applied - consciously applied with feeling and concentration on sharing with the partner. Both partners, not just one. The analogy might be, if you served a seven-course meal in a beautifully decorated restaurant lit with candlelight and soft music so that everything was perfect to the outer sight - but the food was terrible. Tantra is nutrition for the soul, just as food is nutrition for the body. Tantra elevates feelings, mind and body and must be a conscious practice. If it is not heart-warming and enriching, it is just sex no matter how elegant the room looks and feels. Humans have evolved beyond animal sex because the human soul is more highly conscious. It has earned the right to live as a human. It is capable of being considerate of others, and of feeling what the other is feeling, and thinking what the other is thinking. Our consciousness is more sensitive. We have the capacity to manage our emotions. We don't allow lust to take us over uncontrollably, to ravage or rape someone. That we don't always do a good job of reining in our emotions and lust is a failure a fault of the male patriarchal system which doesn't like to deal with emotions. My many years in the couples swinging lifestyle was like attending graduate school. I many things about human nature and will share as I go along. Couples swinging taught me how to love freely, but it also taught me that men preferred sex over love. They did not want to spend much time at it, only enough time to satisfy their physical urges. This was of tremendous value to me. It took a while to understand, but once I got it, it will go down in history as the greatest learning experience of all my lives put together. It would fill volumes to tell the whole story, but after being intimate with thousands of men in the beautiful consensual lifestyle of couples intimacy, along with their female partners, I can say unequivocally that men are the ones at fault. The women want more heart and soul connection but the men are rushing to the climax. Men should not be blamed, and I don't. We have lacked balance. Tantra is a feminine empowerment practice, and men must learn to go along with it, and once they experience it, they will be happy. Tantra is not the science of sex, it is the science of love between partners.
Looking at it from the feminine perspective, Tantra in the western world today is still much misunderstood. It is a wonderful way to bring balance to two people in a love relationship. But from the perspective of the Eastern yogi and swami, it is more about awakening kundalini, not Tantra, as a discipline for men to use to overcome their sexual urges. Celibacy is a goal for many men. This is not Tantra. Those who studied Tantra had a more balanced approach, considering that it was OK for a man to have a family. Engaging in sex once in awhile for the sake of prcreation was acceptable. The western influence is bringing Tantra into the new age with the accompanying feminine empowerment. The ancient yogis avoided women at all costs. women were accused of being sirens, seductresses and temptresses, luring men to a fate worse than death, according to Muktananda's personal account of his struggle during the awakening of kundalini. The leaders of the Jain religion were not allowed to be in the same room with a woman.
Kundalini is the goal of Tantra. The female body is already wired and flowing with its supernatural powers. Kundalini when fully awakened releases limitless cosmic love. Women are already flowing with limitless cosmic love but are not aware of it. Kundalini is pure abstract consciousness. Pure abstract consciousness is light. But it is like light from the sun. The sun's light is cold in space. It does not heat up until it strikes the earth. Then it is felt as heat. The pure abstract consciousness in human beings is designed to travel up the spine to meet the sun's rays, and down the legs to meet the earth's rays. It does this automatically and no one has paid any attention to it. It radiates slowly, gently, upward into the body and downward into the earth. The only probably is, men do not feel it. They have shut their emotions down, while women are open to the flowing of love within them. They are living embodiment of love. And men have to "work" at it. The ancients left the teachings behind for men to become conscious of the living power of spirit that is within them. Where are the teachings for the women?
Because the male body is wired to focus outward in order to build externally, he shuts off inner feelings as a distraction. Thus the flow from this pure life force is stopped. It builds up near the genitals and is felt as sexual pressure. The loins heat up and the first rung of the ladder, known as the second chakra, becomes alive with extreme love and yearning. If he doesn't use it he will explode. Thus sex becomes a need and the woman gives it to him. She naturally feels his need because she is a receiver and she cannot tell what is her and what is him for she feels everything. She is a receiver and she is a giver because she is a responder and a flow-er. She flows this light which becomes very heated when it is blocked. Both of them are unconscious of how their precious and sacred bodies work. They lack consciousness and they do what their ancestors have always done. Physical animal sex without conscious appreciation, love, gratitude, honor and respect for the pure and holy spirit within them is wasted. The most precious gift in the universe is going to seed because of lack of knowledge of the God force.
Women are wired to receive the kundalini naturally, slowly, with harmonic and cyclical regularity. Women are receivers, which is why they can produce babies, but they have been raised to think of themselves as worthless, vacant, stupid, dumb, or worse. Women have no idea of the universal power they contain within their bodies. It is pure abstract consciousness located at the base of the spine or low abdomen, in both men and women. It drips its essence up the spine to circulate through the body to give the body life. The ancient teachings were passed on only to those who instinctively were drawn to the teacher. Today gurus are carrying on the tradition on a larger scale, but it lacks the feminine teaching. Men work at activating it through disciplines and slowly, in this current age, women are joining the ranks of disciples, showing signs of subservience to the male master. Where are the teachings for women to activate the divine feminine within them? They who are already flowing with cosmic consciousness and the greatest love in the universe - Mother God love? It has been said that the greatest among you must be the least, to serve the greater whole.
As for me, I started out with a spontaneous kundalini awakening one day without any fore-knowledge or training, and found myself in unlimited fields of love and light. Bliss, ecstasy, out of this world. And from that day forward, my work began. Bringing love down into my normal every day life with my husband was the hardest job in the world. But as I surrendered to this highest of the highest in me, I was rewarded with extrasensory sensations, elevated feelings of self love. It took a long time. I couldn't share it in words so I had to embody it. There was no other way. It's so far beyond human love that it has to come out in action and mannerism in the every day, normal, practical, mundane life.
Recently I was led to what I call the "final chapter" in kundalini. I started reading scholarly male-oriented journals by the experts of Tantra and kundalini knowledge. It has been shown to me the underlying secret codes of the male and female genders. Men and women's bodies flow in distinctly opposite directions with different focuses. We sit with our backs pressed against each other, looking away off into the distance. I feel that it is time for us to turn around and face one another as equals, and focus our far-reaching gazes upon each other. Since women have always been considered second class citizens, men have not realized the cosmic ecstasy that comes from embracing the WHOLE feminine. He has been using her body to satisfy himself, but what if he backed away and studied her wholeness? And absorbed her mentality? Her spirituality? Her emotionality? Her great boundless love that is forever? Then he would fulfill his own hungry spirit with his own femininity. Likewise, for women to do the same with men and absorb his strength and power for herself and become the fullness of her masculine side. It would bring great peace to the human race if we would all do that. For men are 50% feminine themselves, and women are 50% masculine. Perhaps we don't know how. Maybe my heretofore untold views and stories will help us find a way.
I am Diana of Anakosha and I keep changing this page. I'm writing it more like a book than a blog. It is continuing. The first posting was on 1/5/21, below. Stay tuned as I continue to make changes. It was intended to be a one-page acknowledgment of Tantra's benefits. Silly me. Tantra is an ongoing awakening to ever greater awareness flowing through the meridians and nerves of the body.
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1/11/21 - Tantra with a partner is preparatory for inner union
Tantra is a path, like religion. There are many leaders, many centers, many groups and many practitioners. There is no one way to practice Tantra. It is a spiritual path. One must find it on his or her own. Practice with a partner prepares you for union with the other half of yourself. It is difficult to grasp the concept that you are both male and female in your makeup. So connecting with the opposite gender for Tantra practice is a first step. It aligns you with energies of the opposite gender, which is your diminished side, your weaker side. This practice accelerates the spin of atomic particles in your physical body. They attempt to align with the presence of the other body. You can feel it if you focus your attention on it, which requires the guidance of a teacher. This is the beginning of activating your light body, which is your higher consciousness.
The light body is a web-like structure composed of thousands of little conduits called meridians that run everywhere in your body delivering the light of consciousness and vitality. The separation game played on Earth shuts down these higher connections to the meridians, because we are all focused on the physical. Tantra reconnects us. Tantra requires discipline. One must be disciplined to practice it. Without a leader guiding you to notice certain things, you would never do it. Consciousness is everywhere in the universe and you are connected to this wholeness, this oneness, this source, this intelligence, this creative love and light. It is in you. But it is shut down to only what is required for a species. For example, insects have insect consciousness. Birds have bird consciousness. Horses have horse consciousness. Humans have human consciousness. But humans as a race are on the brink of expanding out of human consciousness to a higher, more unified consciousness. The next level for human is beyond friction, harm, suffering and pain. It is more like the angelic but still human.
Most spiritual paths attempt to get away from physicality. The Tantric path is the only spiritual path that embraces sexuality. More than that, it recognizes the power behind sexuality. Sex is only the feeling of repressed power. We do sex and it gives us release. But there is more to this. The Tantric path leads practioners ever onward to higher consciousness levels, to embrace the whole physical world within the warm and loving arms of the divine perspective. It does not consider sex a sin, but rather holds it within the divine embrace. All physical pleasures are to be enjoyed within the divine embrace of harmony. It is our physical focus that has shut out our higher consciousness.
If you were born to parents who taught you and guided you every day to focus on a physically-based world, your consciousness has been reduced to a physically-based focus. All attention is on physical structures, such as education, books, food, clothes, houses, transportation, health, laws, all physically based. Logic shuts down the magic of imagination which is higher consciousness. When you engage with a partner in a Tantra session, you activate your cells and spin points by closely connecting with the energies of your partner. Your energy fields overlaps and merge. You activate the spaces between the cells and atoms inside your own body. You feel this as a calming sensation. It is actually another dimension of your consciousness and you begin to access new understanding. It is part of you. It is a raising of your consciousness to higher levels than physical. Your focus moves beyond the surface level to a more subtle and refined levelk, all connected to within yourself. You can't help but feel it. It feels closer to home, closer to natural, and it is peaceful. In the beginning of practicing Tantra a teacher is required to guide you. Otherwise you would think you are just sitting next to someone of the opposite gender and wonder “what’s the purpose?”
With guided instruction you move your focus inward to the feeling of sensations. The next level up is the emotional level, called called the astral level in esoteric schools. Emotions are felt as energies when they start to move in the physical tissues. If they don’t move, you don’t feel them. Above the emotional level is the mental level, which is more subtle, less dense than the emotional level, and more refined. It is the level of the average mind. There is a higher level to the mind which is spiritual. This is even more subtle and refined than mental. Your consciousness, under guidance and practice, slowly rises up higher and higher. At the spiritual level your attention turns godward, towards the divine and celestial. It is very elevating. And all of this is possible to achieve with a partner, if the partner is right for you and compatible. The selection of the right partner for Tantric practice is challenging, however. If the partner is attractive to you, you could get stuck at the attraction level and not go any further. Emotional entanglements bring romance and you are back into human affairs again. The goal of Tantra is a journey to within, not to within the other partner! The idea is to move your inner awareness inward to more subtle levels. The densest is physical, the next lighter is emotional, then mental, then spiritual, then into divine experiences that border on ecstatic, rapture, called samadhi.
Having a partner of opposite gender who is thinks like you or close to it, is definitely helpful. The problem is, here in the west Tantra seems to be confused. Women interpret it one way, men another. I’ve talked with different people. Yet there is a science to Tantra. It involves the mystical phenomenon of kundalini and the more practical aspects of yoga, namely postures, breathing and meditation. One obstacle that I see which stands in the way, is monogamy. Because Tantra has the aura of sexuality around it, there could be jealousy. The cultural tradition of monogamy has held many an individual back from advancing themselves through higher stages. Most relationships are made based on personal attraction. But Tantra is not personal and not for the purpose of pleasure or to build romantic involvements. Tantra is an impersonal journey into the higher divine self, using a partner. In the ancient past I read that Tantric gurus, the ones who took students under their wing, would select partners for Tantric practice. Partners would be selected based on challenging proclivities that would not allow them time to fall in love with each other. This might go against the normal grain of the western mind, but it serves to show what Tantra is really all about. There is a reason for using a partner of the opposite sex but it is to enhance oneself, not the partner.
Primary partners will probably not make good Tantric partners, except for the rare couple who are on the same page. The personal attraction approach is largely based on neediness, either physical, sexual or emotional. Not good for the goals of Tantra. But what about intellectual similarities? That might be a better way of choosing a Tantric partner. In the monogamous relationship, if the husband is interested in Tantra but the wife is not, cheating is not the answer because it would cause guilt. Having guilt in the consciousness is not a good way to attain higher consciousness, it would provide a blockage. Frank and open discussions is the only answer. In fact, intellgectual discussion is a good way to open communication between husband and wife if there is stagnancy between them. Up to now, swinging has been accepted as a way to expand the couple consciousness by mixing up energies through sexual swapping. It stimulates them and enhances them. But for one who has grown beyond the superficiality of swinging, and seeking for a more refined way to expand, Tantra is definitely the way to go. I am thinking of creating some workshops myself, but not there yet. And more recently, polyamory and open relationships have become ways for couples to expand themselves. Everyone thinks this is about sex, but it is actually about consciousness expansion. The need to evolve, to better themselves, to understand ones place in the universe. But so far as I can tell, open relationships, polyamory and swinging all deal with the same level of human consciousness. Human. There is needed a more spiritually elevating path to explore that takes into consideration love, sex and the divine union of spirit.
Bottom line, if your primary partner is nowhere ready to accompany you on the Tantric path, then ask your inner guidance. Take time to raise your own consciousness yourself. There is a power within that you haven’t been using. If you are a normal human being you haven’t even begun to touch it yet, although you have had flashes of insight, perhaps even revelations in the form of visions. This consciousness is what we call God. It is holding the cells and atoms of our glands, organs, muscles and bones together. It is the space between the electrons and sub-atomic particles that are in constant motion. Go silent and stop all action. Think the question into the silence and wait. Listen. Just listen. And then get up and go back to your life. You will see. You will receive thoughts and ideas. Love yourself deeply enough to sit alone with yourself. Love is all there is. It is there inside as your own higher consciousness.
This is the homework. It is at the practical level that the greatest amount of work is required. Like taking time out to listen to our body talk. We must learn to isolate our selves from the pack once in awhile to do this. It is transformational work. We are meant to link, join, fuse our inner self with our outer self. The outer self needs is the result of the past. We created it when we were at lesser levels of knowledge and understanding. We are growing in consciousness. Tantra is consciousness work. It brings our focus away from external obsessions and desires and re-trains us to focus on the subtleties. The inner path means inner body. There are many inner paths but none are quite like Tantra.
1/5/21 - Tantra from a feminine perspective
This page about Tantra is presented from a feminine perspective. I (Diana) had a spontaneous kundalini awakening 45 years ago without any training or fore-knowledge. Kundalini and Tantra are related. Kundalini comes from Tantra. Or maybe Tantra comes from kundalini. My kundalini experience was unplanned. It took place during a guided meditation. I experienced going into a sea of light and unbounded reason and harmony and lost awareness of my body. For a few minutes I was part of an unbroken sea of loveliness, order, intelligence, unity, grace, love and more that words can't say. It was unexpected and I didn't know what happened to me. My body began swaying and ended up jumping up and down. My sister who was guiding me allowed me to go through these antics without saying anything. Later that evening she asked me where had I learned to do that. When I told her I didn't learn, it just happened, she was stunned. She was a follower of an Indian guru and had seen others go through the same actions at ashrams. She had never seen it happen without prior training. She introduced me to the word "kundalini" and advised me to find a teacher because its arousal could be dangerous. A more detailed account of that first experience can be found HERE. It is the first five chapters of what was intended to be a book, written many years ago but then life happened and I never finished it.
That first experience probably wasn't longer than five, maybe ten minutes, I am unsure, but it took all day for me to come back to normal. From that day on, it was a force unleashed and I couldn't put the lid back on. Over the next 7, 8, 9 years I had many revelations and experiences that I couldn't talk about rationally. They continue today in a smooth integrated way. I journaled a lot in the beginning to make it feel real for myself, otherwise it would have been lost. The writings have continued into today. My files are now overflowing. Over the last few weeks I have become aware that I came at this from the wrong end as compared to the male gurus, saints and mystics who teach how to awaken kundalini through certain disciplines. But to me, it just happened. Not as a bolt of lightening but as the sweetest, gentlest thing. I came into this force from the topside down, from the opposite direction as written in ancient texts. I have formed several conclusions but I am still learning. I have concluded that my experience is because I am a woman, a feminine being, my soul is feminine, I am naturally a flowing being, not a disciplinarian. I entered into something that was a very high place, very, very high, and I have been trying to bring this vast love and light and sweetness down into everyday life, to put words to it and share it physically with my hands and hugs, to ground it into all that I do. It has been very difficult because I am too light. It was like trying to dive down to the bottom of the ocean without weights. Impossible. It took many years. I have journaled practically every day over the last 45 years. I have been spirit led. There is an inner wind that blows through me at times, causing my body to move and when it moves through me it fills me with unbelievable bliss that transports me beyond this world. The physical sensations are exquisite. I so wish I could share it with others. It is so loving.
My experiences with kundalini was not the result of a disciplined program such as teachers of yoga and meditation present. I did not meditate before this took place, nor practice yoga. Afterward I would have meditated all day if I could. I could not stop myself from going into trance. It was very, very powerfully blissful, like I imagine being on drugs. I had to apply effort to come back. Everything being taught today to awaken kundalini is an organized discipline led by a teacher - yoga, breath work, visualizations, mantras - there are many techniques and programs. Why I had this dramatic breakthrough experience without preparation, without guidance, without anyone to ask about it, I had no idea. I have wondered about it. Last month I had some insight given to me. These insights I will share as I go along. It's about love in human form.
My kundalini awakening came from love. There are infinite levels of love. There is no end to love. I can say that from personal experience. One must become conscious, however, of what love is and how to apply it. I learned about love by acting on, first, self love and secondly physical love with another. My husband turned out to be the best guide and helper I could have asked for had I known. He was better than a guru because he loved me in a personal way. He has passed now but I have another husband who also loves me in a personal way. He too is a loving guide and friend, in a different way than my late husband, but precisely what I need at this time in my life. Human love has no bounds. Each is different. It took years of stumbling to come to this realization. I am now ready to put my conclusions into print. I'll do it here on this website. In those early days, trying to bring this vastness - I wouldn't call it love at that point - down to normal levels of human interaction was like forcing your fat belly into too-tight pants. Or trying to dive to the bottom of the ocean without weights. It just didn't work. Fortunately my husband kept asking questions instead of shutting me down.
Kundalini is a cosmic force too powerful for humans to bear. It comes into a human life through love. Tantra is a path for human beings to carefully bring this force into one's daily physical mental emotional spiritual life in a balanced way. It develops kindness, tenderness and caring for others. This vastness slowly transforms the human being into the magnificent potential he is meant to become. Love is caring about other humans. Caring is what helps this God-awful power to come under biological and mental control. It's a force so powerful it has driven people insane who didn't know what they were doing. It could destroy a whole planet if it were discovered and directed with evil intent. I didn't know about Tantra in the early days of the awakening, but love was there to help me in the form of my husband. Every day I took several hours to go into a closed room and into trance. I taught him, instead of interrupting me with a question, to come and place his hand on top of my head and wait for me to come back. This cut the connection. Otherwise I could not interact with him with words. I would move like a zombie. I needed both the "away" time and his help in coming back to normal. There were times when I couldn't stand it any more and sometimes in those early days, I had to excuse myself wherever I was - at airports, the home of friends, in a public store - and yield to the inner wind and take the involuntary dance-like postures. I couldn't help it. To not yield to this inner wind would build pressure like I would explode. I needed to give it freedom to move 'through' me. It was like cutting the eagle free from its tether so it could soar into the sky. After I felt the bliss flowing through my arteries and veins, I felt wonderful, and was able to continue on what I was doing.
Kundalini is mysterious but there is research being done on it now. Gopi Krishner was instrumental in bringing that about. His books are very scholarly and he uses different words than I use. To me, Kundalini is the unformed potential that provides the power to the physical body and gives it life. It is there in everyone, approximately in the area of the tail bone below or above the sex organs. It doesn't affect the biological functions until it is used. Love is not the only way to tap into this dormant potential, but conscious love is. Sexual love requires love, else it is animal sex. Consciousness and intention is the power that awakens it. Love is the only way to integrate it into the mind and body in a healthy way. Love integrates everything that is out of whack, out of kilter and wrong in a life, with the pure loving spirit of holiness. It was human love that brought me successfully to where I am today, fully integrated after many years. I am led to form my own conclusions and share them. At one time I wanted to 'teach' it, but you can't teach love. You can only share. Sharing is a form of love. As I share these words it opens doors for me to continue receiving more insight. I am learning that love between human beings comes in many, many, many forms. It was the willingness of my husband to be curious with me, who commented, gave me feedback, asked me questions, hugged me when I was haunted, took me to work with him when I was afraid of ghosts, and made me warm milk and sat with me when the evil struck. He made it possible for me to come back to normal again. He kept grounding me to normalcy. Kundalini is the force that keeps the universe operating smoothly. It is held in check by great beings of love. Kundalini is embedded in every human body. It's the only way a human body can be born here. It is the life force. It is a great cosmic power, but love is the directing force. Love melds us together as in unity. Without my husband's constant caring presence, I am sure I would have ended up a psychotic mess. There are many stories of such. They say the spiritual path is strewn with the broken bones of countless seekers. I am eternally grateful for my husband who helped me through it. But there is more to this story.
2 - The feminine approach vs. the masculine approach
A well-grounded sister friend once told me that I was not using my left brain at all, the logical side of the brain. She herself was a very balanced woman. Several months ago (2020) I activated my left brain after years of inability to focus, stabilize or maintain concentration. I started saying to myself, "Left brain activate!" This has changed me. Now I am reading scholarly reports about kundalini and learning about the experiences of others. There is a kundalini research institute online. Kundalini is the power behind Tantra. The search for kundalini came first, as told in very ancient vedic scriptures. Tantra was always vague. I felt it instinctively but did not understand what it was. Now that my left-brain is operating better - not perfect but better - understanding is taking place. It is very satisfying to me. It does not take the place of personal experience but it assures me that kundalini is real. And that other people have also had this experience, and that it is beyond human understanding. It is a mystery. Reading that others have created words to explain some of the phenomena is like finding gold at the end of the rainbow. It is the jewel in the lotus, and it is sacred.
Now that I have completed the transformation process, I am permitted to know the science a little better. The information is coming to me piece by piece, like a curriculum. The science is a masculine science, not a feminine one. There are teachers and practices. There are words. There is a logic, an explanation, as far as it can go. The mystery has been solved, almost. It has been a thrilling "AhHA!" to discover this book by John White, published in 1979, which I recommend for everyone interested in the science. I have added it to the newly created Book page. It is entitled "Kundalini, Evolution and Enlightenment". In ancient times in India seekers called this great divine love located at the pelvic region "shakti", a feminine term, Shiva being the masculine father form. The ancient seers realized the power of divinity when they felt themselves overcome with reverence. They learned how to amplify it with their super-consciousness, a higher level than their practical lmind. They learned that this power was conscious, and it could be expanded by focusing a high level of consciousness on it. A low level did nothing. This created a connecting consciousness that ran like a web stretching out everywhere, touching all sentient life, with this power.
This consciousness is a living thing, but it is only amplified by consciousness. The power of unifying two different life forms is through super-consciousness. This is how harmony is created between two partners. Their word for web or net is Tantra in sanskrit. Those who understood this approach veered off the strictly celibate path of kundalini, and began a separate path different from other spiritual paths. Reverance, love, shakti, feminine became more of an influence. Recognition of divinity humbles a person. Kundalini is the potential, the mother of life who receives the unformed father of life which is flows unnoticed and is wasted, until it is recognizes. Then it enters the biological system of physicality and is felt as love. To simply seek kundalini as the power only, without love, is dangerous. One must ALWAYS approach it with reverence and respect or it will blow out the circuits of the body and brain as many have discovered.
The father of life is the supreme authority which has not yet entered the biological form. It flows on past the one who does not see it or recognizes it. The one who raises his mind and conscious awareness up to higher moral values in surrender, a religious approach, becomes a chalice to receive the father's love raining down like water gathering in a pitcher. One cannot help oneself with this flooding and is bent over in humbleness. This is the higher force known as the top kundalini that comes down from above, to meet the lower kundalini at the base of the spine. When the lower and the higher meet it becomes the holiest of holies. Tantra in the modern western world is learning about using both the top and bottom kundalini, the father and mother forces. To only use the lower kundalini is just sex. There is every possibility that Tantra done in this fasion, with the feminine forces being unleashed, will transform the human race. Sex is to be enjoyed, but to amplify it in this way is to, well, it goes beyond sex. The human body is built for bliss, according to Dr. Candice Pert, a biologist. We are wired for it. How to bring that bliss about is the question everyone is asking. The subject of two kundalinis - the one from heaven and the one from earth - makes Tantra the highest path of all because it brings heaven to earth. All other spiritual paths seem to try to get away from the world and the body, or to transcend the world by avoiding sex. That is why modern day Tantra is a feminine path. Sex will be transformed in time with help of the awakened female of the species, by insisting on lifting the consciousness up out of the dense, stiff walls that men have built around everything.
I have become aware that the masculine mind must analyze, form conclusions, create words and names and make a science out of that which is, by nature, unnamable. The mystery is unformed and unknown. The female accepts this and is connected. It is not the feminine way to name a thing. Her way is to join with it and be grateful for it, to feel it and flow with it. At least it is with me. The most famous gurus who went down in history were men with one or two rare female gurus who were so outstandingly powerful in their way, that they were noted in history. But most female gurus were stricken from the records. I love reading about all of them today, the men have shed much light on what I have experienced. I do not discount them. I revere them and see their place in our world. It is important to read, intellectualize, learn and define. Men are disciplined and shut down the feelings of emotions so they can concentrate on borders and outlines and structures. They follow rigid programs. Religions were made by men. The ancients learned about the holy fires within the pelvic bowl of the human body, and their followers copied them, learned how to do the same, wrote down the formulas and formed a steady path for others to follow. They have been carving out a lighted way for others down through the centuries. But nowhere has the feminine path remains partially unformed and remains in the heavens. Only the masculine way can attempt to define it. Perhaps this is why I have activated by left brain.
There is a feminine way to reach the holiness within. It is natural to females but it is not understood and so many women do not know their own value. They do not have confidence. This is why I am writing and sharing my experiences. The feminine way does not need fixing or correcting, it needs empowering. It is a two-gender system that we have here on earth. The women embody this understated wholeness of love - we call it feminine - and the men build a science around it, make it solid and real. The female feels inward, the male looks outward. The female remains connected to emotions while the male shuts emotion down. The female resonates with inner emotions and expresses kindness, caring, empathy, compassion, nurturing, support and impersonal love for everything. While the male builds barriers and obstructions in order to protect her. This is what human beings are like. There is a quirky wholeness to the system with the female embodying beauty and men focus on building structures with hammers and nails. That may sound feminist, but it is a healthy perspective. Men and women each have their roles to play. It has been a patriarchal world for many centuries, where women are the silent partners and considered unimportant because they were silent. Some cultures even treated women like slaves and abused them, even putting them to death for not doing as they told. And since women were so wonderfully connected to nature, animals and growing things they knew how to heal. They knew what was wrong. They know how to love a wounded body back to health but this was unacceptable to men because in their outer focus they didn't understand it. I speak of centuries ago, and so back then the men decided to create their own form of healing, which was structured in, well, what can I say? It is weird to me today how the pharmaceuticals and the doctors operate. It is not natural to me. But, well, it's OK. Times are going to be changing soon. This age is coming to an end. There is a growing consciousness taking place. Higher minds. Men and women are learning to fit better together and complement each other.
I speak from my own perspective. It is my feeling to speak about a different guidance system especially for women, for they are the true teachers of Tantra. While most leaders are men, look and see that there is a woman working alongside him. The women will empower women, validate them, reassure them, for the men cannot do it alone. Women will tell other women that what they feel as love in the secrecy of their private heart IS love and it is holy and it is powerful and it is sacred beyond any words spoken from an outsider. Believe in your love within. Live the tenderness, compassion, the honesty, the truth, the sacred feelings that are you fee, if you truly feel it. What has been missing for the women is confidence. They have been made to feel valueless, unimportant, disrespected, silenced. They must activate their left brain. Tell yourself "Left brain, activate!" And keep repeating this. See the changes this will bring. Women have a powerful side that has been made to feel worthless. As they cultivate their masculine side, their left brain, they will begin to shine the light on their true inner worth. Have faith in your inner knowledge. Inner knowledge is the only knowledge worth having. Know yourself by the feelings that pass through you. Elevate those feelings and be glad. Do not give your powerful feelings away to anyone who stands outside of you, physically, until you know it is time to give it. The only authority is your higher self. Your super-mind is your mentor and guide. It tells you when it is time and when to hold back. This is not your mundane everyday self, but your higher self, your moral higher self above your head.
What you feel in the privacy of your thought is true if it is compassionate and elevated. If not, then transform it and raise it up. Strengthen that feeling within which leads to greater love for all beings, even your enemies. It is time to believe in yourself and work it into your daily life. You are the power behind the throne. Men, be edified by these words. Use them as they fit you, as you feel them fit you. Men may understand better the ways of a woman by reading this. Even though a man has a different role to play as protector and shield, a man also has a feminine side. This side can be amplified and brought into balance. It is worth considering. The feminine side has been driven out of many men by severe fathers who selfishly controlled their children from infancy with unemotional, cold-hearted, unfeeling criticism and harsh demands. It has been a strict social culture that we have lived in built of psychological slavery.
This may sound harsh and it may sound to be a heretical approach to Tantra, but I believe it is one that will take root over time, as women become fiercely independent in their ability to love and heal, as they see fit, the wounds of an almost broken planet. It is an evolutionary step for the species to have the women come back into their natural power. Not the power that men are afraid of but the power that men will fall in love with all over again. It will bring the genders back together again as each gender is equal in quality to the other gender. Equal to equal in all things, each with a role to play. Each with an opposite perspective which complements and thus empowers the other, bringing about wholeness. It is as natural as the wind and sunlight that men and women should create together a life of enjoyment, abundance, beauty, pleasure and betterment.
3 - Tantra with a partner
Tantra is the science of love in human form. It is not the science of sex unless love has been applied - consciously applied with feeling and concentration on sharing with the partner. Both partners, not just one. The analogy might be, if you served a seven-course meal in a beautifully decorated restaurant lit with candlelight and soft music so that everything was perfect to the outer sight - but the food was terrible. Tantra is nutrition for the soul, just as food is nutrition for the body. Tantra elevates feelings, mind and body and must be a conscious practice. If it is not heart-warming and enriching, it is just sex no matter how elegant the room looks and feels. Humans have evolved beyond animal sex because the human soul is more highly conscious. It has earned the right to live as a human. It is capable of being considerate of others, and of feeling what the other is feeling, and thinking what the other is thinking. Our consciousness is more sensitive. We have the capacity to manage our emotions. We don't allow lust to take us over uncontrollably, to ravage or rape someone. That we don't always do a good job of reining in our emotions and lust is a failure a fault of the male patriarchal system which doesn't like to deal with emotions. My many years in the couples swinging lifestyle was like attending graduate school. I many things about human nature and will share as I go along. Couples swinging taught me how to love freely, but it also taught me that men preferred sex over love. They did not want to spend much time at it, only enough time to satisfy their physical urges. This was of tremendous value to me. It took a while to understand, but once I got it, it will go down in history as the greatest learning experience of all my lives put together. It would fill volumes to tell the whole story, but after being intimate with thousands of men in the beautiful consensual lifestyle of couples intimacy, along with their female partners, I can say unequivocally that men are the ones at fault. The women want more heart and soul connection but the men are rushing to the climax. Men should not be blamed, and I don't. We have lacked balance. Tantra is a feminine empowerment practice, and men must learn to go along with it, and once they experience it, they will be happy. Tantra is not the science of sex, it is the science of love between partners.
Looking at it from the feminine perspective, Tantra in the western world today is still much misunderstood. It is a wonderful way to bring balance to two people in a love relationship. But from the perspective of the Eastern yogi and swami, it is more about awakening kundalini, not Tantra, as a discipline for men to use to overcome their sexual urges. Celibacy is a goal for many men. This is not Tantra. Those who studied Tantra had a more balanced approach, considering that it was OK for a man to have a family. Engaging in sex once in awhile for the sake of prcreation was acceptable. The western influence is bringing Tantra into the new age with the accompanying feminine empowerment. The ancient yogis avoided women at all costs. women were accused of being sirens, seductresses and temptresses, luring men to a fate worse than death, according to Muktananda's personal account of his struggle during the awakening of kundalini. The leaders of the Jain religion were not allowed to be in the same room with a woman.